Clackity Clack Clack - The IBM Model M Keyboard

The IBM Model M keyboard is a classic. With real springs and actual metal in it, the kids today wouldn't even recognize it what with their rubbery smoosh-squish typing sounds, but anyone raised on real IBM hardware knows exactly what these feel and sound like. I still have 3 of them but had to mothball them and move to Dell QuietKeys instead. It was that or go back to being single.

You can purchase a refurbished Model M for about $65 at clickykeyboards.com

Handmade Unique Craft Gifts

Etsy is the perfect source for a hand-made artsy craft gift. Much better than wandering your local flea market. You can shop by color, price and a bunch of other options. Just flip through it until you find some $30 thing you think you can give Mom and call it a day. Or you could flip through Martha Stewart magazines for a few hours and apply your finely honed elementary school craft techniques to create your own masterpiece.

You'll Shoot Your Eye Out Kid

This A Christmas Story Monopoly game is the perfect addition to your growing Monopoly collection. Dot Com Monopoly, 20th Century Monopoly, American Idol Monopoly, ... When will it end?

USB Pole Dancer

This USB-powered stripper pole dancer performs to the beat of your own music. It comes complete with a memo from HR. Perfect for that guy in the office that sent you horse.mpg. Just don't waste this on the douche that sent you that two girls one cup link. (The same people make a USB-powered Family Guy Stewie action figure.)

Personalized Sharpie

For the Sharpie fanatic, you can now order a personalized Sharpie marker with your own message on it. $12 for 6 of them.

The Hillary Nutcracker

Here's an educational and fun gift: The Hillary Nutcracker. The description says it all: "stainless steel teeth secured inside upper legs". Ouch.

Poo-lar Bear Pooper

This Poo-lar Bear Pooper, $6, dispenses lovely brown candy from it's rear end. I work with someone that has the moose version and it still gives him the giggles after 3 years.

Also comes in Oops-A-Daisy Pooper cow, Oh Deer Pooper reindeer, The Waddling Penguin Pooper, and Baa Humbug Pooper sheep.